Friday, July 15, 2005

Ingenious swear phrases and words

Swear phrases and words are part of everyone's vocabulary. Some use mild ones (specially girls) and other's use really offensive ones. Based on the world survey conducted by the ACB magazine on swearing (no ACB is not the Australian Cricket Board, they would be surveying sledging) in 1999, the swearing rate (measured in Beeps, SI unit, defined as number of beep sounds you would hear in a minute in case the sentence were played to your folks) is highest among student community typically high school or upwards students. It is a whopping 5 words compared to the world average of .5 words. Interestingly on an average a student knows atleast one swear phrase or word in atleast 3 more languages other than the ones he understands. Even more surprising is the fact that he (or she in some cases) will get the exact pronounciation.

I have been part of this so called all swearing student community for the last 6 years (with a one year break of course) and needless to say that the naive me has been exposed to a lot of swear words and phrases during this time. Below is a rather incomplete list of amusing swear words, please feel free to add ingenious not so offensive swears.
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f$%^tard = f#$%ing retard
bitch born bastard = poetic way of calling some one son of a bitch, note the alliteration
mother bitch - doesn't make sense but sounds pretty cool
constipated asshole (my current fav)
you gonna die of constipation
you unwashed unwiped asshole since dark ages
pansy gay ass m$%^er f^&*er or pansy gay ass or pansy ass or gay ass or any other combination you can think of


P.S. - I just realized that Beeps is a very subjective unit since some parents would mind even the word "shit" in their children's dictionary while others would be fine even with a lot more offensive words.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

How can you forget Sam's famous "Bulle ki ma" ?

Anonymous said...

English is a chutiya language to swear in man.. it all boils down to variations of a handful of words.

Tam, Gult, Hindi, these are the real languages to swear in!

like..
Chipkali ke jhant ke pasine se tale hue tatti mein pale hue keetanu ki najayiz aulad
:)

Anonymous said...

PS you chutia, by the time you say an insult that long, your intended recipient would have bent over, farted on your face and walked away.

The best insults are short, funny and stinging.

Fuck-stick.

Anonymous said...

chuthosaurus bitchopotamus
Chipkali ke jhant sounds stinging by itself
The idea is that you can stop whenever you want, and at the same time go on for as long as u want to

my point was, English is not designed for swearing.. Punjabi is the swear-king of languages!

AJ said...

Well I was trying to keep hindi and other languages out, coz there are a lot of long swear phrases which are common. I agree with nev, they should be short and should sting.