Saturday, June 25, 2005

I was open minded but the doctor stapled it up

cntd ...

walking towards Sonny Werblin wiping the blood with the kerchief, asking people if it has stopped bleeding.

junta: its still bleeding man, just press it. Hold it tight.

we reach Sonny Werblin,

kane: aa!! aa!! (ogling at the girl at reception desk) excuse me, he is got injured. Do you have a first aid kit.
Hot Girl or may be semi hot (I don't remember, I had a head injury): James (I don't exactly remember the name) we need you at the front desk, medical emergency (speaking in to the micro phone).
me: I will go wash up and come, there is blood all over.
HG: no no, you go sit there, they will come here.

James comes and starts following some basket ball hunk (I don't know for what)
junta: excuse me, the injured guy is here.
James: Hey, you have got a big one.

lots of people around me, looking at me like I am some freak of nature

Senior Medical in-charge: Call the bloody EMS,
me: Will I need the stitches?
everyone in chorus: yes, you have got a nice one.
Senior Medical in-charge: May be you can get some sympathy points with girls
James: No, his hair will cover it. May be you can shave it off.
me (always proud of my hair): NO!! It's not worth it. I will score any ways.

Some one: The EMS will be here soon.

EMS comes,

EMS1: woah!! its a nice deep one. Asks me all the cliched questions, did you faint?, Do you feel dizzy? How many fingers? What is today's date, day? Name of the president? Why do you go to school (ooh, that's a tricky question)?

EMS2 along with me is working on wiping the blood off my face. Then puts a bandage around my head and we are ready to go to the hospital.


junta(in big doubt over medical insurance): Never mind, a friend of our is coming and then we will take him to the hospital.
EMS: When will he come, there is a small window of time within you have to get the stitches. If you leave it open too long, then you cant do anything.

Thats the most ridiculous thing I have heard. As it turned out, it was about three hours before I could get the stitches. Small window of time indeed.

SMI: No matter how much it costs you have to get stitches done, its too big a gash.
me: k, lets go then.

first time in the ambulance, kane proudly sits in front
reach the St. Peter's Hospital. EMS guy almost yells at me and makes me sit in the wheel chair.

I take a nice ride to the emergency and get done with all the formalities.

Sitting in the wait room to be called by the doc. After sitting for about 20 mins, I hear my name. By then dandekar and dalal had arrived. Dandekar told me dalal was all psyched up, but he refused and refuses to give me that psyched up look. I would give anything to see that look on dalal's face.

Author's note: I am getting bored writing this, I am just gonna finish it up.

I reach the place where doc is going to treat me, she comes there after another half an hour asks me the same cliched questions and then she plays a funny game to check my hand to eye coordination. Then she asked me if I would like a local anesthesia or would just take three metal staples and get done with it. I gave her a perplexed look, so she explained that at times anesthesia can me more painful. The way she described it, I wasn't left with much of a choice. I chose to be stapled. When she first mentioned the word stapler with the action and sound, I couldn't quite believe it. She described it more like a paper stapler. I thought she was trying to be funny. But, my worst fears were realized when the thing actually came. It was pretty much like a paper stapler. "Ok, it can't possibly have metal pins" was the thought that crossed my mind. I didn't find out the truth till she actually stapled my scalp and kane took a picture (the one he is very proud of). They were indeed three metal pins.

On our way back we decided to go to the desi store, while I was still blood stained. I was scared people will get all psyched and I will get all sorts of weird looks, but all went smooth but for one small kid who noticed it and pointed it out to his mom.

7 comments:

PS said...

wheres the "small window of opportunity" man...

AJ said...

Sorry dalal, I missed out on that. I have made amends.

Anonymous said...

I bet you spent an hour just thinking up the title for this post :-p

Sorry.. make that two hours.. extra time thanks to stitches ;-)

AJ said...

I would have taken that long under normal circumstances, but I think the shock has kick started my brain so I can think much faster now. As fast as chacha chaudhary of the "chacha chaudhary ka dimag 100 computer se bhi zyada tej hai" fame :).

Anonymous said...

where are the pics dude??

-saip

Anonymous said...

chacha chaudhary.. the days...

but was it 100? I kinda remember just 'dimaag computer se bhi tez'

AJ said...

Pics shall come too, I am just trying to get hold of a laptop with a bluetooth/IR port. The pics are on a phone and I cant transfer it till I find one.